There you’ll be

Have you given any thought to your final arrangements? My Joe chose cremation. So many of us choose this method rather than being buried. I’ve have never wanted to be put in a cemetery where my son would feel obligated to visit and place flowers on my grave. I want to be cremated when my time comes. My parents did as well, but they failed to tell us what to do with their ashes. Their plans stopped at cremation. It was honestly agonizing trying to figure out what to do with them. This summer I will join my siblings and spread my parent’s ashes at the beach where we spent our summer vacations as a family.

Joe was very open about what he wanted me to do with his ashes. Originally, he asked for the impossible. He wanted me to have his ashes put in the parachute of a John Force NHRA funny car, driven by John Force of course. 330 mph down a quarter-mile track and then poof – into the atmosphere he goes! I admit, that would have been cool, but he knew I couldn’t make that happen. So, he gave me an alternative. He wanted to be at our favorite little beach in Florida. His Mom and I will be going there in the fall. But we won’t be spreading ashes. We’ll be leaving stones of Joe instead. I had his ashes turned into stones that can be placed anywhere. If you’re interested, the company that does this is http://www.partingstone.com.

This way I can take him with me whenever I go somewhere new or somewhere we had planned to go together. We loved seeing new places together.

And there he’ll be.

There has been a lot of loss in my life in the last 18 months. If I could give you any advice, it’s to make sure you make all of your wishes known. Right down to what to do with your ashes if you want to be cremated.

To my son, I want my ashes placed in the root ball of a tree. I will have it all arranged. Plant the tree somewhere beautiful. In your yard, in my yard, in a park somewhere. Just not where they might dig me up to build a shopping mall.