The song remembers when

Do you ever fear you’re going to start forgetting your person? Forgetting certain memories, ways they made you feel, or what their voice sounded like?

I’m lucky that I saved voicemails from my late husband Joe and can listen to them whenever I want. I even have some videos from our game nights with friends, and an entire testimonial he did once for a local cancer non-profit that I can watch whenever I want.

But the fear of forgetting is strong.

It’s not like Joe isn’t on my mind all the time. He is everywhere. I see him in his hand-written tattoo on my wrist, in the scar on my hand from that time I tried to sneak a bite of brisket while he was slicing it. His scent is in the pillow on his side of the bed, and in the jacket that is STILL hanging in the garage.

But the fear of forgetting is so strong.

This is why I am so thankful for music. The music keeps me grounded and helps me remember everything. From the songs we played prepping for a barbecue competition to the ones we listened to hanging out on a Friday night. Joe even had a playlist for when it was “time to make the donuts”. That’s an inside joke that makes me laugh now. There’s literally a memory attached to almost every song on my phone, so the chances of forgetting him are really non-existent.

BUT THE FEAR OF FORGETTING IS STILL SO STRONG.

Memories, like that scar across the top of my hand, will fade as time passes. I’m grateful for all the songs that keep my Joe alive in my heart. “Even if the whole world has forgotten, the song remembers when.”