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Have I told you lately?
Over the past four months I’ve had a lot of people ask me what happened to my Joe. I can clinically explain the details. He went into sudden cardiac death at home. We got him back thanks to CPR. In ICU he was put into a medically induced coma on a respirator. They attempted to…
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These dreams
I finally dreamt about Joe last night! This is the first time I’ve seen him in my dreams at night. He visited me once during a nap one afternoon when I fell asleep in the living room chair. That one was brief, and sweet, and almost like a flashback from the beginning of our relationship.…
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Grief in a group
Well, I did it. I joined a new grief group, and my first meeting was tonight. It was held in a church across town. I was apprehensive because the last time I attempted this the meeting was at my parent’s old church and it was practically empty. Two of the three participants were in their…
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Exhale
Well, I can’t explain it, but today was just a good day. And honestly, it’s so nice to have just a good day. No tears, no anxiety, no worries. Every time I thought of Joe, which was all the time, I smiled. I’m thankful for all the years we had together, I’m grateful for the…
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Easy come, hard go
As the year comes to a close, all I can do is keep moving forward. This grief still knocks me to my knees and makes it so hard to breathe. I’ll try to exhale all the stress and sadness 2023 ushered in and pray for the coming year to be filled with a peace that…
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Wasted time
Today pretty much just sucks. I’m working from home (thank goodness) because the tears can’t seem to stop. The sadness is heavy today. I can’t stop questioning why. Why were we able to spend so many years being so happy, going through unbelievably hard struggles together (cancer and the death of parents) and surviving them,…
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Can you hear me?
I find myself talking to Joe throughout the day. The people across the street finally tore down that rickety old garage that had collapsed back on Father’s Day. I stood at the kitchen window telling Joe how glad he’d be to see it all cleaned up. When I can’t find something because he put it…
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