They say the seven stages of grief can be expected after a loved one dies. Shock, denial, anger, bargaining, depression, testing, and acceptance. I’m a very organized and routine person who has always followed the “rules”. When my husband passed away I was expecting those stages to fall in line. It’s only been 54 days since I lost my Joe. In my organized and routine world I should be through all of them by now! What a shock to the system to wake up depressed one day, pissed off a week later, and in disbelief the week after that. I seem to be doing this grief thing backwards. My Joe would laugh at that for sure.
My name is Kelly Pike and at 59 years young, I became a widow. Wow, that is so much harder to type than it is to say. My husband Joe passed away suddenly on September 22, 2023 of cardiac death. That’s what they called it. Not a heart attack or heart failure. Cardiac death. His heart just stopped. And so did mine.
I decided to start this blog because I love to write. It has been cathartic for me to write Joe notes and letters since he passed away. And I have received so much support from other women who have walked in my shoes. But what I realized was most of the information available is past tense, meaning the blogs and websites are full of information on what you can expect with tips and tricks on how to handle things. But who is talking about it in real time?
So here I am. Live and in person laying it all out there. Some of it will be depressing, some of it will be funny, but all of it will be real.
If you’re still with me, thanks for staying. My hope is to post every few days about this new journey, offering a raw look at widowhood (widowness? widowing?) as it unfolds, some history of our beautiful life together that was filled with joy, happiness, trials you can’t begin to imagine, and so much love.
Keep your arms and legs inside the ride at all times. Just like a rollercoaster, this is a high-speed ride that includes sudden and dramatic acceleration, climbing, tilting and lots of backward motion. However, remaining seated is also an option.
Feel free to curl up in the fetal position on the floor with me.
WidowSpeak - Random thoughts after losing my husband 
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