My favorite memory

The day he went into cardiac arrest, Joe had been at a local car show with our newest purchase: a 1979 Ford Fairmont. It didn’t look like much, but it was a badass race car. This car was right where he parked it that day after winning not one, but two trophies. Every time I opened the garage door, there it was. All I could think about when I saw it was the day his heart stopped beating.

The day my heart stopped beating.

I was so grateful when the original owner reached out and offered to buy it back from me after Joe passed away. It was hard to see it go but such a relief to not have to see it anymore.

Since then, I realized there were other things that I should probably get rid of. I had already gone through his clothes and given the majority of them away to local charities. He would have wanted someone to be able to use them rather than just hang in our closet. I kept the hoodies and t-shirts that he wore all the time, and I wear them sometimes because it makes me feel closer to him. Aside from his clothing, there were other things that would just rot away if they didn’t get used. A mechanic for many years, Joe would have hated for things to just sit. So, I offered up his older custom motorcycle, welder, air compressor, and a few of the smokers he used in competition. Of course, I had no idea what any of it was worth, but it wasn’t about making a profit. I am so grateful I was able to find a home for all of those things with people we knew, friends who will take care of those items the same way Joe did.

I know it’s not practical to keep every single thing. And let’s be honest, Joe was a bit of a packrat, so a little bit of decluttering will be okay. I just have to do it a little at a time.

All of my memories of us are tucked safely away in my heart. Those aren’t going anywhere.